#THIS IS FOR EVERYONE.. :
Marriage is very enjoyable. But just as many factors are responsible for making it work, so also are many factors responsible for making it fail. One key that makes marriage work is called: CONTENTMENT.
What is contentment?
Simply put, an attitude of happiness and satisfaction. So a contented person is someone who is happy and satisfied (no matter the situation they find themselves in).
In the context of marriage, contentment means being happy and satisfied with your spouse for who they are, and what they have.
Contentment is an attitude, and as we all know, our mindset to things must be a positive one. In a marriage, the two spouses are to be contented with themselves. Lack of contentment is the bane of many marriages today around the world.
Now let's see the areas contentment should displayed in marriage:
1. Religious beliefs
2. Ethnicity
3. Country of origin
4. Educational qualifications
5. Social and financial status
6. Physical outlook
7. Accommodation
8. Profession
9. Sexuality
Contentment starts from the level of relationship. If satisfied with what one knows or sees about the other partner, then the relationship should graduate to marriage.
Sadly many people care less about the salient issues during courtship. Little or no attention is given to the things that matter so much to them. To most people, courtship is to be having fun and merriment alone.
When we were still dating and courting those days, my woman and I discussed real issues a lot. I am an Igbo man while she is a Yoruba lady. I asked how a few things about her tribe and culture. She did same with me. We were both satisfied with our answers. We talked about my accommodation. Those days I was living in a room and parlour apartment (popularly known as "face me and I will slap you"). She visited me there a few times and she was satisfied with it. Next we looked at my income then, she was also satisfied with it. Next was my profession, and she also expressed satisfaction about it. We got married a few years later I was still in those conditions, and her satisfaction didn't stop or wane. Two years into our marriage the condition changed a bit. I got another job with a little pay rise and we moved into a self-contained apartment. She was still satisfied with me.
Now hear this: contentment doesn't mean that you don't want more out of life. It simply means that you are happy and satisfied with what you have per time. As a newly wedded couple then, we lacked many things. We ate poorly made food (food not sumptuously garnished). We dressed poorly (we could not buy the trendy wears. In fact we didn't buy new clothes in years). The house we lived in was not in good shape. We only had one kitchen, one toilet and one bathroom for eight families to use). Sometimes to bath we queued, waiting for our turn. In that compound we had a bunch of irresponsible and troublesome fellows who were not cooperating on most issues, so every now and then there were heated arguments and sometimes fights in the compound.
Now here's why I am telling you all that: my wife is graduate and comes from a modest family. She lived in her parents' duplex. Yet she agreed to marry me under such very difficult conditions. She has been contented from day one in our marriage till now. May God bless her for her understanding of life and marriage.
Sometimes I wonder why some spouses decide to be a pain to the other partner in their marriage. Why would someone see and know what they are getting into and will get into it and start troubling the other person. That's is really unfair. Please stop it.
As a man, you like women with "big behind", busty, fair-complexioned. Why did you go for a "flat-behind", "tiny-breasted" and dark-complexioned woman as wife? Now you are not satisfied with her and keep hurting her in that marriage. Please stop torturing her, because it's all your fault. Yes, you heard me right!
Madam, you married a low income earner as a husband. Why do you insult and ridicule him every now and then because he doesn't have as much as other men you know have? Why the torture? Why didn't you marry those "big guys"?
My wife and I are very ambitious people. We like class and have taste for luxury. But since we didn't have what it takes to have the classy and luxury things of life, we exercised contentment. Never in our marriage has my wife has given me attitude because I didn't have. Never in our marriage has my wife denied me or deprived me of sex on account of her unmet needs or expectations. Never in our marriage did my wife ridicule in the presence of her family members because I couldn't give anything to her parents then. Rather, she was very contented, we were very contented. Today, we are still a very contented couple.
Dear friends, life is in phases and men are in sizes, hence the need for patience and contentment. Misery in marriage is not a product of lack of many things, but the lack of contentment. Please let's all develop contentment today, and see how happy and satisfied we will be in our respective marriages whether in plenty or in penury. Your best days are still ahead.
Many thanks for the reading, commenting, liking and sharing.
Www.edgewaylife.blogspot.com
No comments:
Post a Comment